Being at Home in Rooms that Work

Have you ever walked into a place that just felt right and wondered what makes that room, house or apartment feel so good?

The myriad books on Feng Shui, clutter and awareness of sacred space offer part of the answer. But after all the bubbling water fountains have lost their appeal, and the wealth corner cures have grown dusty, what is it about a space that continues to makes it work? One approach is to consider three layers of focus for designing an environment.

The first is the sense of order and how the space is used. What is this room about and does it support the activity that happens in it? Can you see the counter to cook a meal, for example?

The second layer is that of spatial layout. This is the realm that is addressed by the basics of Feng Shui. On the simplest level it looks at furniture layout, color, and arrangement. It also represents another layer of subtlety, and includes energy.

The third layer of focus is the purely energetic.

Unfortunately, most people today are either too busy too tackle the job, or simply don’t have the skills to create the effect they want. It does not seem to boil down easily to a prescribed set of instructions or formulas! However there is a way for each of us to start making positive changes in our environments.

The key to designing spaces that truly support you is awareness. Enhancing awareness can be approached by addressing the three layers of focus described above: Order, Spatial Layout and Energy.

Order: Start by simply noticing how you live NOW. How many knick knacks make a home, how many pairs of shoes signify prosperity? Until you really examine your personal sense of order and attachment to possessions and the ways you live amongst them, no change will be lasting.

Another important part of the process is to understand HOW you use your space and belongings. Are you rushed in the morning and habitually spend time looking for the same things over and over? Are you holding on to objects that no longer validate who you are?

Being willing to question your reasons and stories is a crucial component to letting go of clutter that accumulates. This awareness is the cornerstone of making new decisions about the stuff in your environment.

After any practical changes are made, the donation van is called and order restored, the next layer of focus comes into play.

Spatial Layout: The position of your furnishings and the arrangements of art, books, and personal treasure has been the subject of many books. Using the skills of a recommended professional can be the answer. Another option is to recruit the advice of friends with spaces that you enjoy. Ask yourself what you appreciate about the way that do things and consider inviting them to share their take on your newly ordered rooms. Sometimes another set of eyes will reveal options that you had not considered.

Remember that spatial design is not an inborn skill in all people. Just as some of us don’t relate to cooking or gardening, many people simply need some help with seeing how space works.

Energy: We exist in a world filled with energy, which can be seen simply as information. Animals tap into this field of data before storms, and take shelter. No one argues with the existence of radio waves! Most of us accept that information can be stored in ways that we can’t see or perceive without training or instruments. Awareness of energetic fields existing in the environment and generated by living organisms is no different. This information and its effects are there to be perceived, recognized and understood.
Whether generated in nature, originating in electronic equipment or left by human experiences, energetic disturbances can affect our health and well being.
The process of clearing and rebalancing these pattern starts, again, with awareness. Begin by recognizing what you are feeling in a room, and maintaining a grounded sense of your own boundaries. We unknowingly hold these patterns in place with our attitudes and reactions to them. The change in a disturbing charge is brought about by consciously giving awareness to what is experienced, without judgment, fear or sense of ownership. Conscious design combined with simple, personalized organization and balanced energy can turn any room into a place you love to call your own – one that supports you rather than drains you.

Open the Door: March 2009 Newsletter

Greetings from the Composed Domain

The days are getting noticeably longer, and buds are beginning to swell on the plum tree outside my window. And sure enough, Oprah and Peter Walsh, the super star organizer from down under, are zipping around the county in a team of VW bugs, looking to clear clutter in the homes of the unsuspecting! I am also noticing more and more articles in the paper focusing on Spring cleaning and clutter, many of which are addressing the powerful EMOTIONAL components as well as the “how to”s of the process.

Last year I mentioned a book by Sarah Susanka, “The Not so Big Life”, which offers a lovely way to change our thinking about our belongings as well as where we spend our energy and time. I am recommending it again, because I see more and more people looking for ways to address their WHOLE lives. Susanka outlines exercises and techniques within a metaphor of a house remodel along with a very useful appendix that serves as a handbook for the whole book. It makes using her suggestions much easier than many such books, as you can go back and read specific steps and reminders without having to hunt through the entire text.

There is another great book out these days by one of my favorite organizing authors, Julie Morgenstern, called “When Organizing Isn’t Enough”.  She too is on the bandwagon of looking at our “stuff” as a link between our outer worlds….and WHO WE ARE.

She, like many of us in the organizing business, tries to make it all go down easier with an acronym: SHED.

It goes like this:

Separate the Treasures

Heave the Trash

Embrace Your Identity

Drive Yourself Forward

In this latest book she takes her well known organizing approach and enlarges the scope to a review of what really matters to each person.

The first step is focused on re-discovering the treasures in our lives, BEFORE we start heaving in desperation. This process includes recognizing the real nature of our attachments, those to things, as well as relationships and habits.

Many of my clients wonder how on earth they are going to actually use and maintain the systems that we set up. The real glue in those solutions is whether they reflect the person accurately. This requires us to look at the real life situations they face and how they think about their time and energy. Morgenstern’s book  looks at how to raise awareness of those factors, as well as your goals and dreams.

As a tickler for you I will summarize Morgenstern’s advice on how to:

Improve Your Attention

1. Write down your goal and priorities: This breaks the paralyzing tendency to NOT DECIDE what matters most. This step is not about being right or wrong, or even getting things in the “right” order. By writing things down you  create the opportunity to actually SEE what needs to happen,and you can adjust your sights from the start!

2. Tie up Loose Ends: In my classes I call this “Scanning the Scene” – take care of the attention stealers first. Morgenstern suggests that unresolved issues pull at your ability to focus on any projects, and I agree – even if they are as small as a sink full of dishes.

3. Avoid Obsessing over Negative Emotions: Learn to limit the things that trigger the inner critic, or the outside messages of doom and gloom. Come with ways to release these attention grabbers – maybe it’s exercise, even just a short walk….less TV…..talking to people that are positive.

4. Move towards Positive Relationships: Was that a repeat?? Yes, and an important one! Become aware of how we reinforce our experiences. All that stuff about attraction is a powerful force in our lives…and we can each harness it.

While making these connections we can also:

5. Ground your expectations with a Reality Check: Rather than focusing on inner messages that perpetuate a situation, get outside feedback, talk to other people, or join support groups which will help you gauge what is reasonable.

In addition to the steps above I would recommend

Practice on Focus…become more aware of HOW you are pulled off track, and when it is likely to happen. What time of day is worst? What kinds of interruptions can you simply not resist? How long is really reasonable for YOU to work on a task?

If filing never happens, maybe that is due to expecting yourself to do it for an hour!! Perhaps 10 minute chunks will get the job done instead?

That’s probably enough food for thought this month! I hope you are all well and ready for another season, whether it’s taxes or spring bulbs.

And if not, I would love to assist with any organizing projects or support you with energetic adjustments.