Trusting the tools I use to track my busy life is the heart of the issue. If I know that my calendar and phone are synchronized and that I have not made decisions or commitments without using these tools….then at the end of the day I can put them down and stop fretting about what has to happen next, tomorrow or later in the week.

 It’s true that I can’t really control everything that might come up and disrupt my week, but it’s possible to feel supported by a system that will at least let me change course when needed, and remind me of what is most important. In fact, trusting my tools helps me make peace with the reality of life’s general chaos and my own limited control.

Designing your tool requires self-knowledge, not a pre-packaged system with a tabbed notebook and pages of instructions. There is no “right” way to do this, and it needs to be built based on your actual current schedule and preferences. If you’d like help with this, consider a time management session with me, and explore the possibilities.

In the meantime here are a couple other resources that might be helpful:

All in good time: when to save, stock up, and schedule everything for your home   by Tara Kuczykowski with Mandi Ehman.  This is a handy reference guide for some of the home management decisions you never knew you needed to make.

All in Good Time

And another possible tool:

The Online Cozi Family Calendar

I have not tried this tool myself, but it looks like a great solution for a busy family IF everyone is Internet savvy and willing to be in communication by emails or texts. The application has individual and shared calendars, action lists, shopping lists, meal planning tools and best in my mind is that you can also synchronize it with an Outlook calendar.

Naturally there are additional downloads like screen savers and apps for using it on your smart phone, including pre-made lists for shopping, cleaning projects, and so on.

I’d like to hear more about this if any of you try it!

May appears to be a really big one, highlighting everything from meditation to motorcycles. It’s “Get Caught Reading” (not too hard at my house) “Be Kind to Animals”, and “National Electric Safety” month. And wedged in there somewhere are also Goodwill Industries and Salvation Army weeks. So now you know what to do….

Meditate on what you are ready to let go of, load up your motorcycle, after turning off the lights and feeding your pets, read the directions to the nearest drop off center and GO DONATE.

I actually have a box waiting to be delivered, the result of reviewing warm weather clothes and facing the fact that certain shoes in the back of my closet just never get worn. I was having trouble arranging the sandals and my own words came back to haunt me. Make space for what I really use. The two pairs I decided to donate were “perfectly good” and I did enjoy wearing them in the past…and yet, I realized that I no longer want to actually put them on.

Letting go of objects is not a waste, it’s an act of ownership. Ownership means responsibility, but not to the object!!  You are responsible for how that thing affects you and your ability to function. That is where the real value of anything is found. By deciding to own my closet floor I could recognize that those two pairs of shoes were getting in the way. Then it was easy to let them go find a new home with someone who might get real use out of them.

I’m often asked how much of something is appropriate to keep. It can be paper, books, shoes, Tupperware, you name it. The answer is always the same:

1. First ask yourself if the amount you have feels right, or is it a drain? If it really feels right the question usually doesn’t come up, so moving on… If it’s a drain, it’s time to face the process of letting go.

2. How much room do you really have? Our spaces have limits and anytime things are boxed up or in storage, you have surpassed the “reasonable” marker. In order for an amount to be reasonable, it simply has to fit the space you have.

3. The bottom line is that no one can tell you what enough is…in your heart you know when you’ve crossed the line.

There are only a few exceptions to the “boxed up/ storage” guideline:

• Papers and records that are archival material; legal, family, business
• Temporary storage of things like inventory, or possessions that are in transition (from kids, parents, a move) Key word: temporary
• Seasonal household items that are accessed periodically

Otherwise any amount of books or clothes should fit the place you keep them…and feel right. I hope May is a sweet month for you, and even if you don’t make it to the donation drop off, you can still be nice to some animals and read a good book!

To continue reading select May 2012 Newsletter in the list to your right…

Watching the wheel of the seasons can be a profoundly reassuring activity, or an opportunity to panic about the passage of time. At some point in recent years I decided that since they seem to be flying past faster and faster (the years that is), I’d best learn to enjoy the passing pageant.

Continue reading by clicking on April 2012 Newsletter Link

Watching the wheel of the seasons can be a profoundly reassuring activity, or an opportunity to panic about the passage of time. At some point in recent years I decided that since they seem to be flying past faster and faster (the years that is), I’d best learn to enjoy the passing pageant.

This month’s Organizing Tip below, offers another resource for keeping up and hopefully finding those moments when you can simply take in the smell of the rain and the sound of the jay outside the window.

These can be deeply satisfying moments, whatever your stress level is, and they remind me of book called Healing Spaces: The Science of Place and Well Being, by Dr. Esther M. Sternberg. (Thanks to my friend Deb for recommending it!!)

I am going to let Amazon describe it for you:

Sternberg immerses us in the discoveries that have revealed a complicated working relationship between the senses, the emotions, and the immune system. First among these is the story of the researcher who, in the 1980s, found that hospital patients with a view of nature healed faster than those without. How could a pleasant view speed healing? The author pursues this question through a series of places and situations that explore the neurobiology of the senses. The book shows how a Disney theme park or a Frank Gehry concert hall, a labyrinth or a garden can trigger or reduce stress, induce anxiety or instill peace.

Finally, someone is looking at the brain science behind why we like a calm beach or want to explore certain twisty streets!  One tidbit I found especially fascinating is that we have an area of the brain, the Para hippocampal place area, which specializes in recognizing buildings. If this spot is damaged by a stroke, the person will get lost more often because they can no longer recognize buildings or landmarks in the space they move through.  They can still identify objects and people….but their experience of the environment is damaged. These people learn to track their location with smaller objects, like doorknobs or benches.

The studies of what happens in a place that is considered restful or pleasing imply that our brains are soothed by visual cues that include fractals. The definition of fractals can be quite complex, but the main point is that they are self-similar, with repeating patterns at whatever scale you use. They occur in nature in cloud forms, snowflakes, plants…..and the pattern of human heart beats and blood vessels. These visual patterns tend to relax our attachment to issues of scale and boundary, resulting in feelings of well being.

Other parts of the book describe how we navigate a place, and deal with changing scenery. Some of us are wired for landmarks and others do better with grids, as you might know if someone gives you directions in the method you don’t like. Here is an opportunity to read about the neurological background for these differences.

Even if you aren’t all that excited by the connections between hospital architecture and healing rates, the science is accessible and the anecdotes are very interesting. Whether Sternberg is describing the different effects of a labyrinth versus a maze, or how Walt Disney leads you into the Pirate cave, she is pointing towards features of your day to day life in your kitchens, bedroom, and offices.

I wish you all a pleasant Spring transition, from  woolens and heavy coats to T-shirts and (one of these days!) sandals.

Don’t forget to use the seasonal switch as an opportunity to ditch those ratty old boots that didn’t get worn last year!!  And please…if they are not “good enough” to donate, and you’d rather not put a plant in them… throw them away!
Keeping broken things may feel like you’re avoiding contributing to the land fill….but it also means you live in one, and you don’t deserve that either!

It’s typical to be focused on the problem areas, the chaotic pantry, the overwhelming attic or garage, or the stacks of unopened mail. These are the projects that demand your attention and create all sorts of trauma as weeks and months, and even years go by. Tackling them requires a concerted effort, planning and your readiness to enlist help, and get tools for the job.

It’s typical to be focused on the problem areas, the chaotic pantry, the overwhelming attic or garage, or the stacks of unopened mail. These are the projects that demand your attention and create all sorts of trauma as weeks and months, and even years go by. Tackling them requires a concerted effort, planning and your readiness to enlist help, and get tools for the job.

The last thing you want to do is get distracted by little things, like a nightstand. The tiny area of the window sill or the fireplace mantle seems like the least of your worries. Who cares about the refrigerator magnets when the entire spare bedroom is filled with wrapping paper, gifts you’ve forgotten to give and the unpacked boxes from great-aunt Maud?

Let’s take a moment to reconsider. Those small things, the places in your home that don’t attract your attention, or drive you to despair…they are also talking to you. But they are whispering, and what they have to say might just remind you of what really matters. In fact, the messages of these overlooked spots can be just the inspiration you need.

Most people create places for special objects or memories. They arrange a group of photos or trinkets, and then carry on with life. If you stop and really look, re-engage with these places, you will find that things have changed. Sometimes they have lost their special-ness, or perhaps they have become even more meaningful. Usually if you look, you’ll realize that these places need updating somehow.

Please don’t think that I am assigning yet another odious organizing chore! My offering for this month is to suggest that you take time from the big projects to look carefully around at the areas of your home that really reflect your personality and the story of who you are. The top of the piano, the shelves of decorations and pictures, and yes….the refrigerator magnets.

Take 10 minutes to disassemble one of these places, putting all the personal bits into a box. Don’t worry about putting things “away”, just remove them and then clean off the surface. Avoid leaping into decisions, first stop and give the space you have created a chance to breathe. Whether you try this with a bed side table or the kitchen windowsill, the object is to allow yourself to start a new relationship with that surface. What do you want it to be? It might take several days!

When the time is right you’ll get to re-assemble it with fresh eyes, perhaps the photos you have displayed for years will be replaced with newer images. The fridge is a great place to start, because the items on it are usually small. Some of them may be so out of date that they can be tossed – magnets for a plumber you would never call again, invitations to parties long past, or schedules and reminders from last year.

What is the balance between this….

and this….

What is yours?

Mine is divided into a few sections that I fiddle with each season or after a trip. On one side I have the gallery of rogues….photos of family and friends. I group the magnets that are for businesses and services together, my favored pizza place and the emergency appliance repair number. The front is where I gather my most inspirational images, mostly from travel or quotes that resonate in my heart and mind.

The idea is that by stepping into an active dance with these smaller quiet places in your home, you can feel more supported by your surroundings as a whole. Your night stand, for example, is so important! It’s the last place you see before sleep and should soothe you. It probably holds something that wakes you up each day and can set the tone for everything that follows.

Select one or more of these nearly invisible places. When you really see it again you can make smaller but vital changes to bring it into focus. This in turn can inspire and reinvigorate you. It can be a stepping stone to those bigger organizing challenges.

After all, Spring is on the way!

Using EBay to sell a single object can be a rude surprise, it takes a certain amount of energy to understand the system,  watch the auction, package the thing and hope you actually get paid. I have not done this myself, only heard a few horror stories from eager, but now very cautious friends.

If you are looking at large collections of precious things, or a few very valuble items, I suggest letting the pros do it for you.

Professional EBay Sellers Alliance

EBay Consignment Services

EBay Selling Request

And this one might be the most helpful, find out what a “trading assisstant” is and how to locate one in Seattle:

EBay Trading Assistants

You can also investigate actual Estate sale managers, people that can come to you and assess the value of your treasures.  Some of them conduct a sale for you, and I assume others take on individual objects for a commission.

Here is one place to start:

Hannah’s Attic Estate Sales

 Look familiar?

]]> http://www.composedomain.com/blog/2012/02/21/if-you-really-must-make-a-profit/feed/ 0 http://www.composedomain.com/blog/2012/01/26/romancing-your-rooms/ http://www.composedomain.com/blog/2012/01/26/romancing-your-rooms/#comments Thu, 26 Jan 2012 19:48:28 +0000 Rebecca http://www.composedomain.com/blog/?p=1143  

I’ve always been fascinated with the way space feels, and this is why I love working with people in their room, closets and file cabinets. Space invites and teases and opens its arms.

To read more , Click on February 2012 Newsletter

It also can go cold and forbidding, hiding things or restricting movement.

This abiding flirtation with hallways and even public spaces like libraries and plazas, has never flagged and over the years I have learned how and why my environment is so important.

Even though you may not be engaged in a constant love affair with stairways as I am, you are still “in a relationship” with your home, the streets you travel and the places you work and play.  Since February is the month of Romance, I invite you to lavish some attention on a “partner” that is always with you: the rooms you inhabit.

This doesn’t require expensive presents, or even lifelong promises! What brings delight this year can be changed later with no recriminations, I promise you; the walls won’t mind being re-painted.

The smallest offering can provide poignant memories and reminders. I just noticed a small postcard propped on a bookshelf, and on the back was a message from my son on a long ago Mother’s Day. I had forgotten why that particular card was there other than as a lovely image and re-reading it was an unexpected gift.

As you move about in your living room, bedroom, or bathroom, take time to remember that these spaces speak to you with your own voice. They really do reflect a primary relationship, one many people neglect, which is to yourself.

In an interesting little book; Geography of Home: Writings on where we live,  Akiko Bush writes about the various rooms in a typical house, looking at how meaning is attached to each room, its use and history. It’s quite a nice exploration of both the cultural and idiosyncratic use of personal space.

In the epilogue she comes around to stating that a house might indeed have messages for us worth listening to. Bush states that being attuned to the layers of information in the environment is important;  including social and  cultural cues.  The habits and patterns that a house reflects can help people understand the power of home. But in the same paragraph she “rejects categorically the idea that a house has a personality”.

After quite enjoying her book, I suddenly found myself wondering if she had lost the plot.

It is in my heartfelt connection to my house that it acquires personality, and then becomes a living force, with potent energy and the ability to either sustain or drain me. It is a two way street! The environment not only speaks to us, it also listens….and this is where the real power of home lies.

With awareness and willingness to interact and make good choices you can create a healthy and supportive relationship, if not outright romance with your rooms.

They will not object if you forget to call….as long as you come home.